Sunday, July 26, 2009

Bigamist? Me? No Way. Maybe. You be the Judge!

Two years ago, my friend, Sriram, got married. Before I go into the details of his marriage, let me tell you a little about us.

Sriram and I used to be roommates for a little over 2 years during our time in Graduate School. It is interesting how we met and ended up being room mates. During the summer of 1991, I was in the campus getting my admission process rolling while simultaneously looking for rooms to share, when I saw these two Indians walking in the street. A brief introduction later we found we shared not only a nationality but a mother tongue as well. Naturally it helped a lot to break down barriers. They needed a roommate and I needed a room. That is how I met Sriram. It was that simple. My initial suspicions were soon confirmed; although he was from a rich family, Sriram was guilty of being simple, easygoing, and generous to a fault.

After my marriage in 1993, he moved out but stayed still in campus apartments and so we had ample opportunities to meet. Then the Gold Bug bit him, at least the fever to move to the Golden State hit him after he vacationed in California for 2 weeks. I forgot to mention, Sriram was also very impulsive. He very soon got a job and moved to the left coast and has lived there since then. We stayed in touch regularly despite the distance.

Sriram then behaved in the most unfilial manner possible for an Indian boy. He refused any proposal for marriage. Since I met my wife during graduate school and got married, his mother believes he was unduly influenced by me. Soon he met a nice girl in California and after a while she moved in. Melissa and Sriram lived together for a while before he popped the question. She accepted and they set the date.

Now comes the location where they would get married. I told you earlier how Sriram was simple, generous, easygoing, and impulsive. I forgot to mention he was also romantic. He liked the movie Shawshank Redemption. If you have seen the movie then you know the place where Tim Robbins settles after escaping from prison!

I liked the movie a lot and I thought that the place was beautiful too. I wanted to vacation there.

Well Sriram chose to get married there!

If you have not seen the movie, it is Zihuatenejo, Mexico. It is a beautiful place on the Pacific coast.

The marriage was a secular ceremony conducted by a Mexican official. It took place on the beach with chairs set in several rows facing the water. The bride and the groom stood a few feet away from the waves. A ten person music band dressed in beautiful traditional clothes played very nice music. To cap it all there was the setting sun in the background. Altogether it was a wonderful wedding, uniting two very nice people.

During the ceremony conducted mostly in Spanish - I forgot to mention the bride and the groom spoke Spanish quite fluently - the secular minister (if there is such a phrase) mentioned several names including mine. That did not surprise me since I was one of the official witnesses and had to sign various documents. Also I was not sure since there was the sound of the surf in the background we could not hear much of what was said. So I kept quiet till I heard my name spoken for the fourth time and then I knew it was time for me to speak now or forever hold my peace.

Well I am sure you understood what happened. It turns out that minister got the two names mixed up, our names being very long, unfamiliar, and similar enough for him. Now you all know my name is Ramaraghavan Srinivasan and my friend's full name is Sriram Ramachandran.

We all had a good laugh but to this day I am not sure about my friend's marital status....

or mine for that matter!

Thursday, July 02, 2009

Twenty Years Later

I have been in this country twenty years! Two decades! Where did all that time go?

I still remember the blue skies when I landed in San Fransisco on July 4, 1989. Yes I came to the good old USA on the Independence Day. I could not believe that the sky could be so blue. In India I do not remember looking up in the middle of the day for fear that the glare would blind me.

On the first evening, the manager of the motel where I stayed initially in Santa Clara, suggested that we all climb on top of the roof of the motel to view the fireworks. Spectacular!

My first year in this country was filled with so many novel experiences. I remember the awe with which I used the ATM the first time, something that now is passe even back in India.

My boss was amused that I found it strange that someone would accept a plastic card from me in return for expensive goods and services merely on my assurance that I would pay him back in 30 days. I did not realize then that the banks had a noose round my neck! The noose has gotten lot tighter since then. Back then, formal credit was mostly unknown especially in middle class. My parents and everyone I knew paid cash for everything. Now, credit in all forms in ridiculously common place in India.

I remember with wonder that the darkness set at the insanely late hour of 9:30-10:00PM! I had not heard of Day Light Savings.

With no email and only one choice of long distance, I cannot forget what a pinch it was on the purse to make a 10 minute call to India. A minute of long distance was about $3.00! Adjusted for inflation that is about $6.00 in today's dollars. So I would make one quick call to our neighbors to tell my parents to come on line and then after a suitable interval call them again! How crude. Since then India went completely wireless by (almost) skipping the land line phase! I now pay about 5 cents a minute and can call my parents any time, any where, however long I want!

Within a month of coming to the US, I got my driver's license, and soon I became a proud owner of a beat up Honda Civic of indeterminate color; let us say Gray; with over 85,000 miles on it. I roamed all over Bay Area using my new, used car and a bicycle.

I survived the 6.9 earthquake! After that all the minor tremors were like storm in a teacup. In fact I found out that I had slept through several 5+ earthquakes.

I discovered The Supreme Court and pretty soon added much needed bulk to my lanky frame.

I watched the great Joe Montana win a Super Bowl without understanding rudiments of American Football.

It probably rained in the Bay Area, but I do not remember those days for there could not have been many of them. All I remember were long days with blue skies and wonderful balmy weather.

I probably had the most carefree 12 months of my life, which is why California always manages to evoke extreme nostalgia.